Lifetime Piling Up

In 2011

2011-03-25T01:17:00.002+08:00

Lets see...

nothing much has changed

grown older

wiser(I should think)

independent(I hope)

taking the next big step in life

uni life

I wonder if anyone in Singapore is gonna join me overseas

I wanna go out and see the world

but a part of me hates to go

I say 4 months is a short time

but come to think of it,

its long

its gonna be a lonely journey

Im scared to do this on my own

but I need to learn

I need to try

And all those years are piling up

2010-06-17T20:19:00.003+08:00

So while its halftime on Argentina vs South Korea.

Im here to blog. And WOW its been long. Reading back my old posts, I didnt think I was that a wild child, till now. Im growing oldoldold with my current no life status. It's amazing how much 3 years has done to everyone including me. But somethings are ever constant. TAN XIANGLIN still my sister. LEWIS BENEDICT THAM still my hubby.

Hawhaw. Nothing much interesting in life to report. Monday went paktor-ing with hubs go watch Karate Kid. Still dependent on hubs to drive me around since hohoho I failed my vroomvroom test. And we spent the whole night arguing how I failed. I got 2 pts in circuit and 24 on the road. Hubs on the other got 38 pts in the circuit and 6pts on the road his first attempt. SO IM NOT THAT BAD A DRIVER RIGHT?!!!!! Next time he drive and I park. Its called comparative advantage in econs. I still dont understand how he can get 38pts in the circuit.

After movie we went to Thompson eat tau huay. SEE WE HAVENT CHANGED MUCH, WE STILL LOVE TAUHUAY! Than argue sommore. I mean the whole trip from my house to Serangoon to talk to my vroom cher to Bishan to Thompson and back to my house(which he almost missed and wanted to drive to his home) we were bickering. Ya I know we havent changed much together either! But hubs taught me how to change lane so I can pass vroomvroom next time. Love you Ben!

Going back to watch World cup now! Tan Xianglin says so anyway.

Wonder if I should continue this blog. Yes/No.

Just you and me tonight everything will be okay.

For Those Who Still Come Here

2009-01-17T22:51:00.003+08:00

Just like a Nursery kid who is going back to school to learn.

I am going back to school, and making sure its a better year. Be more focused. DONT SLEEP IN LECTURES/TUTORIALS. Do tutorials. Be better at time management(its better now since there is no more project work yo!). And the most important, NEVER to lose my faith again and be dutiful to my daily prayers.

Anyways, I hope I get into cheerobics this year. If I do, I can dance and scream till March and not July. I need to mug, and mug hard. Though I hope I dont lose my head before March will all the front rolls, side rolls, and back rolls.

Mr Obama is gonna be President in 3 days! This is just so exciting. In the future, I will tell my grandchildren that when I was young, I saw racial tolerance grow by an exponential rate.

Be the Change

All About Self-Discipline

2008-12-08T21:21:00.002+08:00

I think I need a shrink.
Twilight Saga is taking over me.
Start homework now.

I'm in Love with a Vampire

2008-12-07T14:22:00.012+08:00

Hello world. Been pretty busy, explaining the long hiatus. Nonetheless, I always have something to rant and rave about.

Picked up Twilight from Borders the other day while doing some shopping, and hohoho its SO DAMN BLOODY GOOD(get the pun?)! I have nothing but compliments for this book. Best book I have ever read in my entire life. Yes, that fantastic. I couldn't put the book down from the moment I started, it made me wanna flipflipflip the pages till im done with the whole book, then I faint cause I didn't buy the next one, and I felt like a part of me was amiss.

To fill the empty-ness I hunted high and low for the movie online, and luck was on my side. Despite being warned initially by my sis that the movie was insignificant as compared to the book, God knows I refuse to wait till 18 December to catch it in the Singapore cinema.

Hello Edward Cullen Love!

You definitely dazzle me. Question: Do you use SK-II to get your skin this white? You see, I use SK-II too but I can't seem to become as pale as you. Sigh. Call me and tell me your secret yeah. Oh and I love the way you did you hair.

Kristen Stewart dear(aka Bella Swan) I love your LBD and all but it looks kinda like for the Olympic ice-skating ring. Robert Pattinson Love(aka Edward Cullen) you look dazed. Perhaps you could use some alcohol, or did you have too much? hmm. Did you guys even comb your hair this morning? tsktsk

ps. Vampire Love, the sun dont really shine that bright in Forks, so I see no reason for those ridiculous shades. Burn those Ray Ban's please.

The one and only part of the movie which I really enjoyed was when they Cullens were playing Baseball in the thunderstorm. Thats because that was the only part where I could feel some emotion all thanks to Muse's Supermassive Black Hole music that gave me a slight adrenaline rush.
Honestly, the movie was mediocre. The acting by both the stars wasn't very good either due to little chemistry. I swear I found it so difficult to feel the emotions of Bella. Especially when she spoke of her thoughts, I couldn't stand her voice. Though I give some credit to Vampire Love for attempting those mysterious eyes, but his voice wasn't mysterious at all. Sigh

I sound like a big fan of Twilight, but I think I can be its worst critic too. I mean for girls like me with little romance to life, sure we love the story. But for those wanting to read it, here's a gist of what you will get. 'I Love you, but you cannot Love me cause Im the bad guy. So stay away from me, but not too far cause Im intrigued by you. Anyway, Im not that bad since I feed on animals not humans. Are you afraid of me? Please say no cause you're my life now' Plus another quarter of the book is dedicated to adjectives describing how gorgeous Edward is.

You know what? Just read the book. Stop ranting here.

I Found You Flightless Bird

No other way to better say

2008-11-16T09:49:00.007+08:00

SOCCER GANG

Boyfriend love's got skills. whoo

For the first time in a long time...

I Love You, Is That Okay?

Dear God

2008-11-07T23:30:00.003+08:00

Thank You for Getting Me Promoted.

Im trying to fool the Soccer Gang into thinking I got retained.

Cheap Thrills

Wondering bout boyfriend Penshah. hmmm

Dessert Bowl

2008-11-06T09:37:00.007+08:00

Desserting at new places with Huiling darling and Sherman love.

Our new place: Dessert Bowl at Serangoon Gardens

Huiling's Mango Ice

I would give it an above average. Topped with ample mango pieces, and a big scoop of vanilla ice-cream, with ice shavings and palm sugar at the bottom.

Sherman's Durian Mousse

The minute you sink your mouth into this, your in for a ride. Well, thats for the durian fans atleast. Upon the first bite, your hit with the strong taste of durian. Thank Heaven's it didn't have that strong durian smell.

My Starwberry Ice

It was slightly diluted, but other than that, it was rather good. Wasn't too sweet, and yes, a big scoop of vanilla ice-cream.

Met darling Thomas at our favourite park, which had lights this time. Talked for awhile till Huiling had to leave, so we had to walk her to my house where her sis picked her up.

The night being young, we attempted to walk to zhonghua, but ended up at the closest coffee shop cause the guys wanted to drink, which than lead to eating too. For one, I didn't know that coffee shops would be open at like 12midnight. You would figure their reaction from the new revelation I had.

Its the same old deal, talk and talk and talk. Walked me home, talked some more. Reached my house, and they went to admire pretty much every car in the carpark before they left.

Darling Thomas is closing into getting his bike license. You know I can't wait.

All of the people start to rush. Start to rush by.

To My History Maker's...

2008-10-30T01:34:00.008+08:00

Just as warm as the sun was in the picture, it gives me that warm and fuzzy feeling.

Look close enough and this picture is what I would describe as LOVE.

Yesterday, was the last day of JC1.

Yes, its amazing. 8 months felt like 2 years.

Well, nothing much has changed.

I still love them.

Absence only makes the heart grow stronger.

Its been hard, but we passed the test of friendship with an A+.

From Val's breakfast, to eating Yu Qian's preserved plums in the chem lab, love notes for encouragement, plus Wenna's cheek pinching antiques, Shar's music to brighten the day, and Gwen's Hello Kitty marshmallows, not forgetting a daily tune or two I would sing as contribution on my behalf. The thought of it just brings it all back.

Im feeling Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious

Daddy Lovies Birthday

2008-10-19T08:55:00.000+08:00

Marina Mandarin's buffet is love.

Food Whore!

*ignore the false dates*
This is in cronological order, serious.
Dessert is always on top of the list.

1.Hot Cheng Teng.

So yummy with lots and lots of dried logans.

2.Chinese Pancakes stuffed with red bean paste.

3.Durian Puff. (you know I don't eat durian, but this was rather good. The durian taste wasn't too strong, and it didn't leave a strong after taste)

4.Yam Kueh. Still wondering how they got the kueh to look like that. 5. Mango Mousse
6. Rasberry Mousse

7. Green Tea Mousse. yummy

8. Hazelnut Cake. It taste like the Thousand Leaves cake at Coffee Bean.

9. Apple Pie. It wan't that nice. Rather bland.10. Toasted Bagel for starters.11. One good bowl of sweet porriage for a cold rainy day.

12. That very nice fried casing that is supposed to have some radish filling, but I passed on it, cause I just love it plain. hah!

I know I said I swore off sushi after bf and tons showed me that horrendous video of bunch Japanese fishermen killing dolphins. But I figured I wont be eating any dolphins in my life, so I stopped my boycott.

13. Nori-tama (Sweeted egg wrapped with seaweed)
14. Uramaki (California roll)

15. Zaru Soba (Cold Saba noodles)16. Chee Kueh. Childhood food.

17. Siew Mai. The meat had a nice soft texture, but it lacked that crunch cause they didn't put in chopped water chestnuts.

18. Sweet Corn Ice-cream! (yam ice-cream at the bottom)
With my rainbow sprinkles, pink chocolate shavings and chopped macadamias.
Afer this, all I can say is LOSE WEIGHT! ROAR!

Happy Birthday Daddy Lovie!

I know he liked that TY Ghost I got him, plus a mixed cd of our fav tunes. whoppie.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

For all my wannabe TaiTai's, here's a lesson on making Muah Chee.

Directions:

Cut a lil dough, and make sure to dab off all that excess sesame oil.

Modern TaiTai's are thin!

Note: A lil dough goes a long way, cause it yields a lot Muah Chee. Yes it does.

Place dough in mixture of ground peanuts, ground sesame seeds, and fine castor sugar.

SnipSnipSnip that dough into puny pieces.

Your children don't have that big a mouth. Slather each piece with a generous amount of the peanut mixture, and rollrollroll.

Note: You know that everyone around wants a piece of your masterpiece, so use that scissors as a weapon and protect your Muah Chee.Place on a pretty plate and serve to hubby and children.
You'll make the best TaiTai in the world! Wheeee.

It's a Love Story, baby, just say yes.

Darling Hui Ling's Sweet 18

2008-10-13T22:56:00.006+08:00

Huiling my Superstar. Ahem. Yuhang's marvelous cactus present ideaAwww. My darlings 18 candles
Make a wish baby! Musical chairs
SCANDAL Sherman and Hongfei's version of Westside story
HAPPY BIRTHDAY DARLING!

loved

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I don't mean to be evil and spoil the happy post, but this happened on the very same night. Oh wells, you can just laugh at my agony to make up for it. Anywho's Oh-so-thrifty Justina decided to save her 45cents on a bus ride from Huilings place to chompchomp, and traded it for a standing ride behide Sherman Tan's bike. Which was a super cool idea in my mind since I have never stood at the back of a riding bicycle in my life.

Here are the outcomes of the ride:

TADAAH!

2 days later...

this is the champion. freakin pain okay.

This is even worse than cheerleading man.

Wanna add more laughter to that?

After like the 3rd or 4th bus stop we passed, I gave up and took the bus with the rest of the other guys. The tyres often touched my legs, thus inflicting the above damages, AND I STILL HAD TO PAY 45 CENTS FOR A BUS RIDE TO CHOMPCHOMP! Go ahead roll on the floor and laugh your ass off. I'm not the sort to curse and swear, but when I was showering that night, I was cursing in my heart. FREAKING PAIN!

Wanna laugh even harder?

When I was reaching home, I saw Jonatons, Kuan Siong and Shengyang again, with their bikes in tow walking pass my house. Guess what? Jonatons bicycle tyre burst and the 3 champions were walking from Serangoon Gardens to Toa Payoh, and it was like 12.30am. Our 3 Trackers reached home at........*Drumroll Please*....2.23am. What sheer determination they have to go home. The soccer gang never fails to amaze me.

you should know it's hard to just forget the past to the pass

Through It All

2008-09-19T22:47:00.003+08:00

Admitting to my loss of faith, I fell on my knees and prayed.

Not knowing if it would even reach the ears of the Lord.

Not thinking much about what I did the night before, I went about my day as per usual.

Than someone came back to me.

It only hit me after switching the computer off.

From the bottom of my heart, I thanked the Lord.

Jc has really tested my faith.

In addition to failing every single subject, I failed the most important core subject in life.

I failed you, Lord.

Today I stand before you, with my life in pieces.

On my part, I will spend 10 hours fixing my jigsaw life.

In hope that you'll spare 1 minute to help me.

Cause I really cant do this by myself.

Take it to the Lord in prayer

This is Ground Zero

2008-09-17T01:25:00.005+08:00

I cant even believe im doing this.

Im tired of this life.

Im tired of going to a place were all I see are lies and fabricated stories.

Im tired of not getting the attention I need.

Im tired of feeling invisible.

Im tired of proving myself.

Im tired of screaming my lungs out, cause whats the point, no one listens.

Im tired of not getting things the way I want them to be.

IM FREAKING TIRED OF BEING TIRED

Why the hell do you guys try to sympathise for me, when you guys arnt even there when I need you. Ya you can repeat that "you know what honey, although you feel lost in this big ocean, God is always there. He will never leave you. He's there to save you" Oh great thanks. Leave it all to God so that you dont have to do anything. Thanks for feeding/clothing/paying for my tuition fees. BUT ALL I BLOODY WANT IS THAT YOU ARE THERE TO LISTEN TO ME! Asking for that is like asking for the sun and moon combined. Great, I just created my own ocean at 1.25 in the morning.

I cant do this on my own.

Delayed Childhood

2008-09-13T07:51:00.006+08:00

Oh crap, I slept the whole of yesterday night. And ya, NO WORK DONE! shitshitshit. Okay from Today onwards, its an OATH.

I WILL STUDY LIKE A DOG

Justina, you are gonna disappoint everyone if you don't get promoted. What the hell are you doing sleeping? You're eyebag reading is just 7mm? Who cares if its 2mm more than what you achieved during the O levels. You had better bang hard on those books now!

Okay after I post this.

I had this dying crave to feel like a little school girl again. Don't laugh! So I bought myself some $20 white Bata (buy and throw away) shoes. Wheeee. These shoes are more comfortable than my tenthousandpound nike sneakers. Im like the super outstanding person in jc. While everyone is wearing sport shoes, Im wearing white Bata shoes. Whooo.

Huiling Darling came over to my place yesterday to help me read my Chinese passages. Yup. So kind of her, right. Our late evening snack.
The biscuits are super cute! Actually there is one missing. the one and only pathetic camal in the whole packet. Sigh. Addicted to these bisuits. Love!So we were waiting for her bus, when my King drove pass. Yeah, I pushed Huiling into the SLK and off she went. I hope huiling told my dad about good Justina. haha. Thanks my darling! I can always count on you for some Chinese help, Lovie dovie

Mooncake Festival is tomorrow! Lantern carrying and mooncake eating. Can't wait. My King bought me my Goodwood Park Hotel 4 eggyolk mooncake. Egg yolk is love. Plus my Queen made a little green frog(thats me!) lantern for me to play. haha. Such a kid man.

Okay, STUDY!

A special good luck to baby love. We will survive promos togerher.

Ulric Sunshine. I need your daily Midnight calls.

Stressed Out

2008-09-06T20:33:00.004+08:00

Wooooo.
Met boyfriend today.
Feel kinda bad cause I didn't really eat much of the food which he paid for.
Ya and at the end he was scolding me. Oh wells.
Finding it difficult to get lost into his mesmersing eyes cause of his growing eyebags.
Maybe, its mutual, my eye bags are just as bad.
Im gonna take a ruler and measure my eyebags daily.

Holidays are ending, bummer.
Need to find ways of getting MC for a month so I can cook myself at home to study.
Any suggestions?
Promo's are coming!

NOTE TO BOYFRIEND
In response to your question,
I want to get promoted, so we have to get promoted together baby.
At the most I'll just transfer to your school for J2.
Trust me, I will.
Eat more Smarties baby love, they'll make you smarter.

oh snap, I just did another bf post.

Okay, next post shall NOT be on bf.

Hang in there people!

Notes Piling Up

2008-09-05T19:23:00.005+08:00

Justina's great organisational skillsG-TEC-ER!

Okay this is damn hilarious. I showed Aloysius these 2 pics, and he said. "I see lipton tea, my fav". "my fav pen". Woooooo.

Gonna return boyfriend his notes tomorrow, plus get more notes from him. LoveLove. What will I do without him.

I suddenly realise that bf is taking over my blog. haha

Okay and Im missing Xianglin.

I love listening to Akon's Sorry, Blame it on me, when I do math.

Bf sent that song to me.

Remembering when he sang it in the Art Room.

Those were the great times we all spend it the Art Room.

Right Xianglin?

Getaway Tonight

2008-08-31T13:12:00.007+08:00

I'm still waiting for my other pictures to come in from yesterday's 5N BBQ at Pasir Ris Park, so I'll just upload the pathetic 2 I have. Pardon me as they are blur.

BOYFRIEND!

I Love this picture of him. Its kinda artistic.

Middle finger - My Bling

Pinkie finger - Boyfriends Bling
WE BUY OUR BLING AT THE SAME STORE!

We're fated to be together. Everyone please keep your hands off Penshah. He's mine. That includes you Sherman Tan.

Wenna Darling was stuffing me with food when I first arrived. Feel very loved by everything she does for me. No one peels prawns for me like she does. Okay I admit, I was lazy.

Feel kinda bad cause Huiling and Xianglin Darlings were doing all the cooking, though I did help out a little. They were the heroes of the day. Lovies! If it weren't for them plus Sherman and the other guys, there would be no bbq people. I'm already missing Xianglin and Huiling.

Roasting the marshmallows, while talking to Yong Keat and Zhen Ying. I was shocked that Burger King told them alot about me. haha. My reaction, "HUH?! Jia Kang told you all that". Jun Xiang is horrible at making smoke circles, he should just stick to smoking without playing with the smoke.

My dad gave Thomas Dear a lift home, he thought Thomas was my boyfriend. Laugh. And I was like, "No, he's too havoc for me". Can't wait for Dear to get his bike license so he can send me to school. Woohoo! That is if he doesn't kill himself before his test. If not, I'll be left with Aloysious.

Havoc guys attract me

Contradiction

What He Does

2008-08-22T22:54:00.003+08:00

From the top of the paper, you'll know who I'm refering to.

Just laugh.

This is compensation for our date.

FAINT

2008-08-22T22:24:00.001+08:00

BOYFRIEND FORGOT OUR DATE ON NEXT FRIDAY!!!!!!!!!

SO MUCH FOR LOVE!

hmph

Bring On The Rain

2008-08-22T19:40:00.009+08:00

I love my dad's banana yellow tie!

Plus, its matches my school uniform. Oh yeah! Though in reality, my schools tie is a HIDEOUS x 10^infinity dark blue(yes, this coloured blue). I just can't help but wonder who was the blind bat who chose such an uncoordinated colour for a tie, to match with a mushroom coloured uniform.

Anywho's, wow a week flew by so fast. It was just Monday when I saw boyfriend for a split second. Laugh.

My Queen just called from Thailand. haha. I'm already feeling the side effects of not having my parents around. Super Lonely. My King is playing golf at 7pm Bangkok time. Funny

Where was I? Oh ya. I hope I didnt make bf late for school the other day. Bleah. I'll be having my important econs test on next Monday and Wednesday. Wish me luck.

Bf's birthday is on Thursday, which is kinda 'great' timing since I freakin end school at 7pm, cause of the extra math lectures. Argh.

Whatever it is, next Friday will be the day yo! Oh snap. I still have yet to get Fish teacher a present, okay I think I will write her a love letter in chinese.(Xianglin/HuiLing, HELP!) So many predicaments, so little time.

Bring on the thunder

He'll Always Be My Burger King

2008-08-15T22:12:00.002+08:00

It was the normal econ's tuition with Val, and extra people Ben and Burger King.

Ben objects to any photos to be taken with me. Im one sad soul.
I want Vals spec's
Sigh, my Burger King. It's been a long time since I have seen you.

He looks smarter now, studying all that mechatronics.

Okay so the exams are around the corner for the poly people. Here's wishing them all the best.

You can do it! Woohoo!

Love, Your Dairy Queen

My Little Message

2008-08-09T23:38:00.005+08:00

Dear Boyfriend,

it has become evident that you have not been sleeping much, with those eye bags closely competing with your buddy Yuhang. Not to mention that you are actually sick, running a fever, and coughing your lungs out. sigh.

Our first date today, was to watch fireworks and aeroplanes, but sadly, it was called of our plans. I know your sick, and Im super duper touched that you came all the way down so as not to disappoint me, but you being sick is a greater sadness than missing out on the show we planned to watch (actually, its kinda equal. I love aeroplanes alot).

Whatever it is, Penshah, dinner was great. Im waiting for the 20 days to pass so we can go dating again. Woohoo. Zhonghua is calling for us baby.

If You Love Me, You Will Sleep

Ooooo Penshah and I look super cute together! Eyebag Prince & Princess. Yuhang is the Eyebag King, Huiling can be his Queen. haha

I think Hasyimah wants to murder me now for stealing her Love. Oh Snap. Wait don't say, I suggested we ask Hasyimah to join our date, but he refused. I tried my best okay.

WALAO EH! I THINK I CAUGHT PENSHAH'S FLU! MY THROAT FEELS KINDA DRY NOW, SHOULD HAVE LISTENED WHEN HE TOLD ME TO KEEP AWAY. BUT HOW CAN I? THANKS BOYFRIEND.

Frolicking Under The Sun

2008-08-08T23:11:00.002+08:00

Breakfast with Darling Xianglin at Central's Mac.

Chatting with Aloy makes us all high. WOOHOO!
Thoughts

Happy 18th Birthday Sherman! I miss Huiling lotslotsCheerleaders
We LOVE Frolick
What a Day

I Won The Penshah War!

2008-08-03T17:07:00.005+08:00

*Tha BO$$* says:
Hi sweetie

*Tha BO$$* says:
i found some of the lecture notes tat are very useful

*Tha BO$$* says:
which my school don't have

Name a wish, place it in your heart. says:
great to hear darling!

*Tha BO$$* says:
thxs sweetie

*Tha BO$$* says:
hahahs

Woohoo! Penshah is MINE!

Wanted Hearts

2008-08-02T15:46:00.004+08:00

Woohoo! What a morning. Met Val Darling outside Zhonghua today, and guess who we saw? Sherman! haha. He was waiting for Hongfei, so they could go back to school and find Miss Tan for Math. Hardworking man.

We headed to Mac for our usual dose of Hotcake therapy, but before I could start my lesson, we had a surprise interuption by Wenna, Hongfei, and Sherman.

'WALAO EH!' DAMN BLOODY MISS THEM!

I threw my hands up and gave Wenna a super duper BIG bear hug. They hung around for a while, but left for Prata House, and tuition after.

You'd figure that it was a hell of a good morning. After teaching Val, she and her childhood friend sent me home. haha. Less than half an hour later, I was back at central cause I needed to pass MY DARLING PENSHAH the history notes I dug out for him. Penshah Penshah, he is so tall now.

Okay, its like a little class reunion today. Damn happy yo!

-Angels Sigh-

Hotcakes & Maple Syrup Part 2

2008-07-25T21:53:00.005+08:00

Its been a hell of a week. 31 hours of school in 3 days is crazy. Whatever it is, I have 2 tests next week and they are super important so I'm gonna study real hard for them. Yes, I love math and chem. I really do, just that it get veryveryvery frustrating when you spend an hour on a question and you still can't solve it.

Okay I shall stop here. Studying Time! Passing my chem test is gonna be my birthday present to Thomas Dear. haha

Val is coming over tomorrow so I can teach her econs, and guess what she'll be bringing along with her?

HOTCAKES & MAPLE SYRUP!

I have been carving for them since Tuesday, so I made a promise to myself to study damn hard for the next few days cause it will bring me closer to my hotcakes. Woohoo!

-That's My MacDonalds-

Hotcakes & Maple Syrup

2008-07-19T14:14:00.008+08:00

Lets see, after my dumb pw pilot test(which went surprising well) on friday, I went to visit my darling Val at school. What can I say, it was on the same train line I had to take home, and I wanted a taste of poly life. Whats funny? I sat through her guitar club lesson, studying my chem. haha.

Anywho's, I HATE Ben's N.U.M friend. I mean when you call someone, you would presume that the person would be the one to answer the phone right? So ya, I called Ben, and screamed "DARLING!"over the line. Wait, I screamed "DARLING!" like 3 times, and after that, the line went dead. You'd figure it was that dumb NUM guy who answered his phone. Shit you man, who gives you the right to hang the line on your friends call, and then again the bloody phone ain't yours. If you're secretly gay with Ben, then say it. Im not gonna steal him away from you. You can have him dude.

Okay whatever, I know im being super sensitive.

After that, happy Val and I went to eat at hougang. We ate at Long John. It's only good food when there's great company yeah. The pic looks kinda gross, but it was damn sweet. No one cuts my fish, and pours clam chowder over it for me, other than Val. I was super stuffed after the fish.

And Val needs to eat more.

After dinner, she went to find her friend, while the dead-but-alive me trained home.

This morning, I stuffed her with hotcakes while I taught her econs. You know what really makes my day? Its when I feel appreciated. And Val makes me feel that way. The little things she does just lets me know im remembered and cared and loved.

-A girl like her is impossible to find-

Youth Day

2008-07-07T09:00:00.006+08:00

Today is Youth Day

Today is Study Day

Woke up at 6 to make breakfast for my Darling Val, then sending her off at the train station, feel like a mother sending her child off. bleah.

Okay, STUDY TIME!

wheeeeeeeee

Wait.

Some champion 'cher' typed this in the student portal.

Title: Ongoing Theft
Body: hey Innovians, i would like to remind you people to keep all your valuables safe cause i have just lost my handphone and my new laptop in school.

People People, as a 'cher' in jc, I would think that they would have gotten their basic grammar right.

Lets see what wrong shall we?

Did not use Capital letter on the first word of the sentence.
Hello! You're addressing the entire jc1 student population, could you sound more formal by typing your 'i' in Caps? I can't believe they complain about us using sms language when they themselves use it. Talk about the pot calling the kettle black, or more like 2 wrongs don't make a right.
Okay, this is not part of grammar, but didn't your mama remind you to take care of your valuables? I mean, yeah I feel bad that you lost your phone and your NEW laptop, to some gate climbing Indian guy, but I thought teachers were supposed to be responsible creatures. (Oh snap, I just realised the 'cher' modified the message. The previous one had some sentence which went "The suspect is a Indian man who climbs over our school gate.")
HA-HAH! see that "a Indian man". Yes people the 'cher' forgot that when your next word starts with a vowel, you use an 'an'. Sigh, and I'm giving him the benefit of the doubt that he spelt Indian with a Capital 'I'.
This is not part of grammer to, but, thanks alot 'cher' for reminding us to take care of our stuff.

I hope this 'cher' isn't a GP 'cher'

Why Don't You Com'on Over Valerie?

2008-06-30T14:45:00.006+08:00

"LOOVE!" was what she called me eveyday, and LOVE was what she showered on me with everyday.

Till today,

Valerie is LOVE.

-Cause She's Sweeter than Apple Pie-

What Do You Remember?

2008-06-20T13:27:00.011+08:00

If you'd ask me, this is what I would say....

I'd remember the way he walked into class for lessons, more like he sashayed in actually.
The way he liked to poke at the teachers desk when he wanted to emphasize a point.
Why he took so long to mark our test papers.
The smoky scent our test papers had.
His Tiffany rings from the Atlas Collection.
His blue Crumpler that had this funny black and white toy dog keychained to it.
His black Tucsan which had rainbow coloured toys on display at the front of the car.
His love for Adidas.

In my mind, I still can vision him walking into class, writing stuff on the whiteboard, and explaining it to us.

Okay, its kinda weird but my brain has got this ability to remember quite alot of useless info. I remember it was nearing the O's, and Mr Kelvin Tan still had yet to return us our test paper. Honestly, I was a tad annoyed, and so was everyone else. And who else could be better at expressing their discontentment than Benedict right? Ya, and so because of that, the voice of Mr Tan screaming "Lewis Tham! Get out of my class!" is still trapped in my head.

His last question to me was, "So where are you now?", and he didn't believe I was in JC cause I wasn't in my uniform. But I guess I proved it to him when I went back for their sports day. That silent smile he had on his face during sports day was the last tangible site I had of him, and well, maybe that last and only picture I would have with him.

Honestly, I never really did pay attention in his class, be it History or Social Studies. I was either caught up with my math and science, my mind was building sandcastles in the air, or the occasional, yet ever so often little naps I would take everytime he showed us videos. And well, sometimes I'm just more interested at looking at his Tiffany rings. bleah

Maybe thats why I'm not cut out for the arts stream. I don't understand why we need to learn about the past, we know the leaders made mistakes, we know that we are supposed to choose our governments wisely, if not we will just crash and burn and be living in slums. I just never really got the subject.

Whatever the case, God had his reasons. With every passing, it only reminds us to live each day like its the last. And we shouldn't be sad about Mr Tan's passing cause he is gonna have eternal life in heaven. So smile you guys, cause I'm sure thats what he wants to see from above the white fluffy clouds.

-That isn't Hitler's moustache, its his nose hair-

REMEMBER?

The Night was a Perfect Shade of Dark Blue

2008-06-14T12:51:00.016+08:00

Met Ben at Vivo cause I wanted to watch my Kungfu Panda, but the seats were all way infront. So I passed on the movie. Oh well. We had like 2 hours to pass, so we walked around. Went to Coffee Bean cause Ben wanted his lemon cheesecake. While Ben ate, I did my favourite FOC pastime, People Watching. My Mission: Spot the number of people wearing leggings.

When the guys came, they went to Adidas to play their stupid Euro game, cause Pauline still had yet to reach(The guys spent like an hour at that shop, playing that game. sigh). Huiling and I went to walk around, and I found this super cute sailor striped dress at Forever21. Shall charge to Ben's card next time. hah!

Ben was tired from his chalet, so I was a kind soul.

When Pauline came, we headed to Clarke Quay for dinner.

Our BusniessmenDinner!1st picture, Yuhang gives a dumb face 2nd picture, Pauline gets annoyedThat's what sweet couples do.SmilesYuhang so wanted to sit that again.

From Clarke Quay, we walked all the way to the Fullerton Hotel.

Our Busniessmen again.

What to get for Ben's Birthday present? Valentino underwear.

It was 12midnight.Say Merlion.Play dead
If you were wondering, Ben's head weighs a ton. Sherman and HongfeiSweet couple
Damn hilarious picture. Yuhang is eating Ben's red sock. Just LaughWalking to the esplanade
Supper!

The guys than went to the pub next door to watch some Euro football match. And ya, I sat there wondering why guys find football so fascinating. Snore. Shared cabs home. By the time I was home, it was 2 in the morning. Yup, I was home early. Bleah

Loves

I think this would be our last meeting in the next few months to come. Need settle down and studystudystudy. I'm sure the guys have a ton of their other projects to.

Till then.

-Keep it Strong-

Lost

2008-06-02T19:04:00.004+08:00

I guess this would be the time I tell people that I need a break from everything. I really need to find myself right now. Not to sure if I can qualify for the term Depression, but I think Im on my way. It's just that I find it so difficult to sit down and absorb my work. My mind is just so out there that I find it so difficult to contain my thoughts and concentrate. So please do understand. If its one thing that I ask for, its just for your understanding. I know you guys have always showered me with hope, faith and love, and I know I have not been repaying you guys for all that you have done. But I just need to be ALONE, left by my solitary self, away from everything and everyone, and gather my life back together.

Sorry.

Find My Own

2008-05-30T23:09:00.006+08:00

Yes, met Ben again (Big Yawn), with Xianglin, Huiling, Thomas Dear and Sherman for N&B TAUHUAY(opposite Zhonghua).

Xianglinlin! I so miss calling her that.
Chemistry!
What can I say, math was more interesting than Ben.

Sometimes I wonder how I managed to endure Ben 5 times a week, for 5 whole years.

After tauhuay, we went to walk around the night market. Remember the last time we walked down that same stretch for night market food? I do I do! After our History paper! Those were good times.

So it was the usual eating and laughing before we headed home, and as for Dear, pubbing at Gardens(sigh). Tired Tired.

You know no matter what, I will still be here for you xl.

Lie with me and just forget the world.

It Started Out As a Feeling, Which Then Grew Into a Hope

2008-05-29T12:27:00.008+08:00

Met BEN AGAIN, with Huiling, Yuhang and Penshah. We headed to Vivo cause I wanted to shop, but it ended up with us watching Narnia, all thanks to Yuhang.

The show was pretty good to say the least. If I were the sort to enjoy the fighting shows, I would have said it was super fantastic. Like I said to Ben, I don't think this show is PG, there is so much fighting. But the scenes in the movie were super pretty and the graphics were amazing, so 2 thumbs and toes up for that.

Reepicheep, your so cute!
I guess Yuhang can find some peace standing beside Dr. Cornelius cause his eye bags are far worst than his. Okay, I'm mean.

After the movie, Yuhang left for home with mommy. So the 4 of us went in search for dinner.

Dinner at Carl's Jr.

And boy was dinner hard to swallow talking to these 2 guys. Thank God I shared the meal with Ben. They kept going back to the mass conversation we had the night before. After dinner, we went to walk around the open area. And for Huiling, take more photos.

Lets all practice our math and count how many Penshah photos we have, shall we?

Picture 1

Picture 2
Picture 3
Picture 4 with Ben
Picture 5 with Ben
(I have no idea what they were doing)

Wheeee. Lookie people we have 5 pictures of Penshah!

How marvelous!

YES PENSHAH, WE KNOW YOUR SINGLE, AVAILABLE & ADORABLE.

WE SO GET THE PICTURE, LITERALLY.

Oh look, 1 MORE PICTURE OF PENSHAH.

And Ben's giving a dumb face, while Huiling's being the rose among the thorns.

I just see too much Pink in these pictures.

It was home after that. You could tell Huiling and Ben were drained.

Which then turned into a quite thought

Which then turned into a quite word

C'est La Vie

2008-05-27T01:30:00.004+08:00

Went down to ps with my Godma and Cousin first in the morning. We walked and walked and walked all the way to Wisma, and than we walked all the way back. It was a great opportunity to burn off those extra calories. heh

My childhood game.

Met Ben after I sent my Godma and Cousin off to the train station.

It was Ben's idea to watch this.

The movie wasn't too bad. Hilarious is what I would describe it as. I thought the part when they were rushing for their marriage counseling session was super funny.

After the movie, we met Xianglin and Xiao Tong for dinner. Ate at Pastamania, again, I was so sick of Cartel/Thai Express food. Xiao Tong had to go to work after that and Xianglin had to go home for her second round of dinner.

So Ben and I trained back to Serangoon and took a bus down to Hougang to meet Thomas Dear and Sherman.

Super high when I saw an NTUC cause I have been craving to eat this...

The guys just thought I was plain insane, but it was super yum. Big Smile. And I made a new discovery, who knew the characters on the cereal box had names.

Everyone say 'Hi' to Pop, Crackle and Snap.

Hi!!!!!! *Wave hysterically*

So I was questioning why they named them such weird names and here's what Dear said. Taking the box and examining it "Why not you just call and ask them. I'm sure the number is around here somewhere" How funny.

We just sat around and chatted till it was late, Dear and I found common ground on certain people. Yea!

Time to go home.

In translation, That's Life.

We Fly On G-5

2008-05-24T10:33:00.016+08:00

SCREAM HOLIDAY!

SCREAM FREEDOM!

Met Shar and Gwen for lunch yesterday, so good to see them again. Plus it was great news that Shar got into a school to do her mass comm. wheeee. As for Gwen, she's suffering where she is too. Oh well, we will get by together.

Ohoh, while walking around Kovan, we realised something new, there's a NewYorkNewYork there! Like ya. In the past, we had to travel all the way to Raffles City, now, its just at our doorstep. hah

At night, it was supper with the usual Supper Club, plus a few more, Huiling and Yuhang.

Ben acting cute. sigh

Yuhang almost made me lose my appetite cause he opened the folder containing Huilings brothers after surgery photos. Bread Pudding! for me and Chemical bonding for Huiling. haha

Huiling had her Chicken Chef Salad, the one I oh so love.

[Picture of Huiling here]

Popular Dear and his Waffles.I have no idea what Sherman ate, but it was macaroni and super spicy from what I heard.
Yuhang was literally stealing everyone's food, okay, we should sympathize for him cause his food came last. Glad to see he has recovered from chicken pox though.
And it still amazes me how much Ben can eat.

I think this was his 7th meal for the day.

Cause Huiling and Yuhang were dying, they decided to head home. And this time, Justina walked Yuhang home. haha. Now I know how much Yuhang has to walks when he walks me home. Bow to Yuhang, bow.

Not to mention that as if the walk wasn't killing enough,

BENEDICT'S RANTING AND RAVING AND SWEARING OVER NEW URBAN MALE WAS KILLING ME!

I was so close to sleeping over at Yuhang's place, cause I thought I would die when Ben walks me all the way home. From where we seperated, Dear went somewhere with his other friends, Sherman went to find Jasmine I think? As for Ben and I, it was all the way back to Serangoon for us. And since I'm here typing this post, yes I did survive and return home in one piece.

Yup, thats the start of my holiday. BIG SMILE!

Don't stress Don't stress Don't stress

Lecture notes to the left left left

No stress No stress No stress

Party the holidays to the best

Keeping The Faith

2008-05-17T15:34:00.003+08:00

Okay, just 1 more week.
ONE MORE WEEK people!
I'll be FREEEEE.
Like a bird, like a ghost, like Casper, I CAN FLYYYY.
Just that to get by this week, I have to endure a whole chunk of exams. ARGH.
Determination is the key Justina, yes it is!
I CAN DO IT, YES I CAN!
I'M SO PUMPED NOW. haha

JUST ONE MORE WEEK....

The Darkness, The Park, The Bike, Ben, Sher & Dear

2008-05-10T02:57:00.008+08:00

Had supper with Ben, Sherman and Thomas Dear.

Headed to Bean at Gardens, talked, crapped, and listened to Ben's SUPER LAME jokes.

Just a lil note for everyone: remember the bbq at Ben's place?
Well, when the party was all over, Ben passed his house keys to Wenna and I so we could get our stuff.
And you'll never guess what Ben asked me just now.
Ben: I don't know why ah. But when I was going up to my house, than suddenly Justina and Wenna pass me my house keys.
Me: You passed us your house keys! Bet you didn't remember cause you were so drunk.
Ben: *Blank Stare*

Even Dear, as drunk as he was, remembered giving me a hug before I left. And all Ben remembered was rubbing my head. I think remembering your house keys is more important than rubbing my head boy. sigh

We than walked to the park near church, where we hung around inside the dome. Chatted some more until Dear's friends came. Dear rode his friends bike, and my did he look so fine. haha.
Thomas=Hot
Thomas+Bike=Super Hot

By that time, its was reaching 2, so they walked me home. Than they cabbed home.

My Loves

Reasons

2008-05-01T21:02:00.002+08:00

Say it with me....A-T-A-P-C-H-I!(is that how its spelt?) Had buffet last week at the club.

Who needs Ice-Kachang when you can have a BIG scoop of atapchi. Loves

Still don't get why Ben holds on. (Apologies if its blur)

I found a box of empty Chivas boxes outside the school bus stop the other day.
The many many reasons why I love Ulric. He truly is my Sunshine.

Cause there's really nothing I would change about him.

Why All I Need is Just a BREAK

2008-05-01T16:31:00.002+08:00

I'll be heading back to zhss soon to collect my very overdue certificate. Any followers?

Argh and the freakin wheather isn't helping anything. Like seriously, I'm so close to walking around the house in my underwear.

I think my routine of pon-ing school is gonna return real soon. God knows by the end of my jc life, the letters I produce can be compiled into a folder itself. hah!

And the best news of all, NO CHEER FOR 1 MONTH! WOOHOO! How kind of Mrs Jen to give us a 1 month study break for the DREADED Summer Tests.

xoxo

Not Alone

2008-04-26T14:39:00.002+08:00

3rd Cheer practice, if you can see, the other BIG bruise has sort of subsided but I got a new bruise right beside it. Sigh
4th Cheer practice, we were traning on the track for Sports day. Bigger Sigh
I remember carrying this paper bag holding apple muffins to school a long time ago. Those were the times...
Have you ever felt that you have failed so much that you have become numb to it? I never enjoyed this feeling but it seems like I have to live with it from now on. Gone are the days when I did well for my tests, dreading it everytime I collect back my tests.

I may sound anti-social saying this, but I have learnt to distance myself from my classmates. I just never really felt that bond with them since day one and it doesn't seem to be changing, so I will hang with them, but when it comes to studies, don't expect alot from me.

Sometimes I wonder if there is that kind of bond found in this world anymore, especially as we get older. Yes we are growing, and our minds are matureing. But it doesn't mean you have to be boring. In the eyes of our parent, we are still kids, and I'm sure all they want to see is that we are living life to its fullest potential, as well as having fun.

A classmate of mine came crying to me the other day, she told me that her close friend said that she wasn't giving much into their friendship. All she did was take when her friend gave. I had a little silent laugher in my heart, and thats not because I'm mean or anything. It's just that its so obvious that she lives her life just between her home, school, her stupid bf who she doesn't call bf for some stupid reason. Obviously I didn't tell her that though.

At this point in time, I guess I should be telling everyone that I will make an oath not to give up on my studies even though I'm failing super badly now. Determination is the key Justina, yes it is.

-Give Give Give-

Accident Prone

2008-04-20T03:19:00.003+08:00

The DANGERS of Cheerleading.....

I would just like to notify everyone that I'M NOT A FLYER!!!!

Okay I admit to being a little annoyed, but whatever, maybe I'm just fat, or I'm short so I have better C.G so they use me as base. And I'm freaking literally carrying a girl on my shoulders, ALL BY MYSELF, and she's BIGGER THAN ME! Thank God he blessed me with stronger inner strength so I can lift her up.

A little note for my 'ahem'(I though I divorced him a long time ago, but he doesn't want to let go)hubby, I won't know how to land the next time you throw me into the pool. haha. Go figure the link.

So the flyer kicked my wrist not on purpose when I had to catch her legs. And than...
That was my first cheer pratice, mind you.

Next cheer practice...

Cause I had to carry another girl on my shoulders.

I have no idea what I'm doing.

-Justina means Pain All Over Her Body-

Reminise

2008-04-19T00:15:00.005+08:00

I Will Remember You

-Ryan Cabrera-

Eight years later

Time goes by fast

Got my memories

And they will last

I try to keep it simple cause I hate goodbyes

I try to keep it simple by telling myself that

I, I will remember you

And all of the things that we've gone through

There is so much I could say

But words get in the way so

We're not together I will remember you

I will remember you

We're a picture in my mind

And when I wanna find you I just close my eyes

You'll never be that far from me

So don't say goodbye cause

You'll never be that far from me I'm telling myself that

I, I will remember you

And all of the things that we've gone through

There is so much I could say

But words get in the way so

We're not together I will remember you

You were there when I needed a friend

Thank you, thank you

I never told you how much that meant

God thank you, thank you

I will remember you

And all of the things that we've gone through

There is so much I could say

But words get in the way so

I, I will remember you

And all of the things that we've gone through

There is so much I could say

But words get in the way so

We're not together I will remember

We're not together

I will remember you

-(Will You?)-

Biggest Smile, Deepest Happiness

2008-04-04T17:06:00.010+08:00

Huiling said that Ben has lost weight, and I didn't believe her at first. But after comparing it with a pic from our 5n days, I will have to agree with her on that statement. hahahaha.

I do admit to being pretty down since I've been back in school. The people you meet there are just so different from the ones I'm used to. Gone are the days where it was all innocence and fun, its now all just dog-eat-dog.

Well, I ended school early today, God knows when I'm starting my cheerleading practice(yes, you heard me right). It so happen to be Zhonghua's Sports Day too. So without second thoughts, I was on the train heading to Serangoon.

Hmm. Who knows when was the last time I saw the Soccer Gang? I actually forgot. Oh wait, it was at Ben's bbq not too long ago. haha. Oh well, it seems like ages to me. The word 'Happy' doesn't come close to what I felt today. It was like that missing part of me was found again, and I have never smiled so much and so long since our Zhonghua days. It was like a life in full circle. Perhaps its just been a long time since I sat with people whom I know of that don't have ulterior motives.

(I don't want our next meeting to be during Teacher's Day. If you were to ever make the time for me, I would make time for you. I have learnt my lesson, I would never push my family and friends aside for the sake of my studies as what I did during the O levels. Lets just say I'm trying to strike a balance now. You should know better, and that is that I will still care for you, be there for you like I have always been. I've stuck with you thick and thin through this 5-6 years and it wouldn't change. )

Sometimes I forsee/fear the day when we go our separate paths. Cause I only have a small pool of friends and I am pretty much close to them, hence it's so difficult when the situation is just out of my control. If you can see, I'm not betting much on my friendships in jc so you guys are actually all I have. On the day that I die, I don't think I would have 5 big buses of people following me to be cremated, but it'll just be comfort to have my small circle of friends and family.

Ok. I need to stop.

My last 2 Pictures!

Yuhang trying very hard to understand why I only play Bubble Puzzle on any game console that walks the earth.

-I drew a new face and I laughed-

Animals

2008-03-30T10:19:00.003+08:00

Yeah Yeah. New car. My dad bought my mum a new car just to make her happy. Family car down graded in size. 4 seater. I think my butt is enough to cover the whole back seat. ohoh but the back seats are so cozy, you can watch a movie in there anytime. I just love the Peugeot keychain. So pretty.

I got a shock of my life yesterday when I didn't recognise Huiling! While I was in the car waiting for my mum to buy dinner at the Serangoon Garden market, I saw this black girl walking towards the car smiling and waving. And I was wondering who was that weird girl. And suddenly when I unlocked the door for her to come in, I remembered that voice and I was like, Huiling?! (she is sooo tan after her camp) haha. Who knew my car no.'s were that well known. Than I saw her again at J8 that very same night after her movie. The world around us is that small.

It was raining last week, so we had to go to our civics room for flag raising. To our surprise, we were greeted with a fluffed up bird which was looking very stressed(most probably locked in there the whole night. poor thing).
And yes, it was raining the other day too, if you look close enough, you can see little birds taking shelter on the branches of a plant. So cute!
When I reached home the other day, I did something rather dumb, perhaps its just a habit. I reached for left part of my blouse to take out my name tag, only to realise I dont wear one anymore. Than I just sighed to myself on those days gone by. -Long Distance Line-

Every Monday is a Sunday with Them

2008-03-11T21:33:00.009+08:00

Braving the rain, we went on with the bbq. Mentally prepared that I wasn't coming home dry anyway. Wenna dropped by before we headed to Ben's place.

When we reached, we saw Huiling, Xianglin, Sherman and Darling Thomas, Yuhang, plus (the not so keen people I want to see) Lorrain and friends.

At this point, you must be wondering what happen to the rest.

Here's the answer. Mahjong.

Though I must add, that Ben and Kuan Siong were really feeling the room colour. hah. Oh well, according to Yuhang, Yellow is the colour of the year. But I checked it out, and they said it was Blue.

Guess around that time, Wendy, Hash, Xiaotong, Levina and Kendrick came. We just sat around and talked. The guys finally decided to leave their gambling den to eat. So it was just normal socialising and eating. Penshah came too. Funny why he's having more fun in jc compared to me. Bummer.

Sherman wasn't changed much. But Ben's hair looks much better now. I think.

If you could tell, it wasn't very 'happening' at the beginning. ButButBut, when the Martell started flowing....

all hell breaks loose. We played a few games. And it seemed like everyone had their chance for a shot, or more. EXCEPT ME! Litong said I was lucky though I beg to differ. And it didn't help that Wenna told Ben about what happened at Shar's bbq. So he was like "Little girls shouldn't drink". Atleast I did help myself to 2 or 3 shots with Ben and Thomas before the games started. And I finished the last parts of the bottle with them too. haha

And well, at the end of the game, we had TWO HEROES, Benedict and Thomas.

The 2 Champions were taking filled to the brim shots Before the game, During the game, and After the game. Not to mention during the games, both of them were taking in shots every 2 minutes. I swear I was so worried. If you were there to see their faces, you'd freak out too. They were soo red.

And although Ben said he was okay, you could tell he was faking it. I was worried for the life of both Wendy and I. haha. I literally screamed at him when he came beside me. Atleast Wendy wasn't in site. Lucky her.

After all that alcohol, Ben decided to drown it down some more with a dip in the pool. Wonder who else followed? Yuhang, Thomas, Sherman, Hongfei? With the guys wet, you know what follows. Just who got wet first. I think it was Amanda, than Lorrain, than Wenna, and after being chased by Benedict, hugging onto a table, dragged on the floor by Wenna, carried by hand and leg down a flight of stairs, and 10 steps to the pool, I was thrown in the pool. Guess Ben tasted success. Till today, I don't know who were the people who threw me in, was it just Ben and Wenna? I will never know. But I remember kicking Ben's butt when he caught hold of my leg. hah!

Huiling and Xianglin got wet too. Everyone did get wet, except a handful. Not counting that Wendy and friends Chickened out. Spoiler man you guys.

With everyone wet, Amanda started throwing the guys shirts and our flipflops into the pool. You could tell by than, we were all high too. And what do you do when you have flipflops in the pool? FLIPFLOP FRISBEE! Litong was the unlucky one. It was just a game between Huiling, Xianglin, Litong, Yuhang, Thomas and I. Fun Stuff.

Right now I'm not to sure if I was partially drunk cause I don't really remember alot of stuff. I think Thomas Piggy-back me in the pool. Sigh, I don't remember. Whatever. Thomas is mine. Don't steal him alright.

Wondering what happened to our TWO HEROES at the end of the day?

After all that drinking and playing, all that darling Thomas could give me was a blank stare, Guess his pubbing experience didn't help. As for Ben, I guess he wasn't that bad, he still could climb the stairs thats for one. But he M.I.A-ed after he stepped into the house. Apparently, he puked his guts out and drifted into lala land. Both Heores K.I.A.

So what do you say people?

Lets give a big round of applause for THAM SHENG QIAN LEWIS BENEDICT and LAM WEI JUN THOMAS.

-Cartoon Heroes-

Checked up on darling today, he says he's alright. haha.

Happy Birthday Muffs!

2008-03-09T21:56:00.006+08:00

Celebrated muffs 18th Birthday on Saturday.

She had a mini bbq for her close friends and family.

Not to my surprise, her house is still as messy as ever. Actually, there has been an add on to the hazardous level. The ceiling in her room is literally DROPPING DOWN, you need insurance to enter that room. No joke.

Yet again, I was the first to arrive. Lazed around since everyone was doing their thing to get the pit started. It didn't take much anyway, cause the pit was very small, just enough for everyone there. Wenna came after that, and that, than shar's bro started cooking the wings and thighs.

Auntie marinates the best chicken wings ever! Oh-So-Very Yum!

So we just sat around, talked and ate. Catched up with Wenna dear. She seems to be doing fine, just like everyone else. 'ahem' not to mention the drinking. Well, after the wine, and 2 bottles of vodka, I was a tad high though everyone said I was drunk. Hey, atleast I said I felt a little high. Plus I still remember the 4 numbers muffs gave me to remember. 1214. 4D anyone? haha. It's my first time feeling high (oops). Atleast I learnt something that day, I sing when I'm high too. haha

It sucks that the privilege of seeing your friends everyday is gone. Okay, think happy Justina.

Absence makes the heart grow stronger.

Where was Gwen Chan Simin?

That girl. She was in church and she only came at 9 plus? We actually had a few rounds of 'Guess what Time Gwen is Coming'. But we all lost in the end. Gwen is forever late. Sigh.

We manages to trick that blur birthday girl that there was NO CAKE. And she believed us. Can you believe that?

So I bet when muffs saw her Swensen Blackforest Ice-Cream Cake topped with a lighted Big candle and 8 little ones trailing behind it, she was ELATED.

A Picture Speaks a Thousand Words
Who says you can't embrace the child in you, even if your 18. BubbleBubbleBoilandTrouble.

Gwen came, like finally. She had her share of Aunties yummyyummy chicken and had some yummy cake too. It was just the 4 girls as we used to be. Back to the times. Back to the start. In the end, we were the ones standing at the beginning together.

Darkness turns to Light
My little girl is all grown up now. After 11 years, that Primary 1 girl across my house has matured so much. Still remember playing Barbie Dolls with her. hah. I don't think she knows it, but the best thing she has ever taught me in this span of frinedship, was that family is important. She has always been the adult while I'm the child. I teach her to be a kid, she teaches me to be an adult.

Imagine where we'd be in 10 years time?

Happy Birthday Muffs!

I LOVE YOU!

-My Boo-

Friday Night Out

2008-03-08T18:09:00.012+08:00

After reminiscing about the days gone by in Zhonghua, we headed for our dinner date at the Fish & Co Glasshouse. Though I did suggest a meal at a different place where it would be lighter on Yuhang's wallet, he refused. Sigh, that stubborn boy.

Most of them ordered the standard Fish & Chips...

Jasmine's new hair cut makes her look like a lil doll. Cute right?
Shoot me if you will, but I wasn't really keen on eating their Fish & Chips AGAIN. And I was eyeing their grilled salmon so badly, though it cost like 17 bucks. In the end, the worst got the best of me and I ordered it. Felt so bad for Yuhang. Butbutbut, the salmon was fantastic! It was coated with white and black sesame. So Yum.

The six of us chocked up a bill of 127 bucks. Sorry Yuhang

In serach for dessert, we walked to Plaza Sing, than to The Cathay, Than back to Plaza Sing. Where we finally decided to eat at Cartel. My Treat! I'm always game for dessert!

Peiru and Huiling. Big Smile.

I secretly think Yuhang's a girl.

Limin and her Oreo Frappe.

I gorge on desserts.

Limin and Peiru left half way through our desserts, cause they needed to catch the last train back. Than it was just Huiling, Jasmine, Yuhang and I. After we were done, we trained back to Serangoon. Huiling was very tired, and so was Yuhang. You could tell that both their eyes were about to shut in no time. So as much as I tried to persuade that silly boy not to walk me home, he still insisted. Oh well. Often I feel very guilty that he walks from my place all the way to Kovan. haha. He's my hero.

Cannot stand this picture of him.
Doesn't he look so cheeky?
*faint*

-Leave a Mark on this Earth-

I Miss...

2008-03-07T17:54:00.012+08:00

Even though I said that the day I stepped out of Zhonghua was the happiest day of my life, I take it back.

Honestly, going back was comforting to my distressed soul. Familiar grounds where I have played, loved and studied at. Familiar faces, liked or hated. Its just the whole aura that makes me feel secure.

I Miss... walking down this block every morning.

I Miss... the invisible line we drew around the study benches outside our classroom, that gave us the authority to hog/study on them day and night.

I Miss... studying hard TOGETHER. The support we gave each other was priceless.

And I Miss... THIS BENCH, at the study corner. The memories surrounding this bench is endless. With much joy its has brought and the heartache it represents, I love this bench. If I could buy this bench, I would.

It was when I was talking to Lao Shi, that she opened my eyes to why I'm feeling the way I do. She said that I have grown up in a secruity zone for the pass 5 years hence I find it so difficult to let others in. Cause even though a few of our classmates change, its just between us 2 classes. N1 and N2. So there wasn't a need to worry about making friends as we have been friends already. Thus going to a jc was a 'cultural shock' for me. And while other students had 2 months to adjust to a jc system, I was only given 2 weeks. Plus it's alright to fail in jc. She said that if the teachers in innova arn't willing to help, she told me to come back to ask my Zhonghua teachers.

(Can you believe this?! I wonder if I can study for my A levels in Zhonghua. I want Miss Ong for chem, Miss Ting for physics, Mr Lim for GP, Mr Wong for math, and lastly, my favourite 'fish' Lao Shi for CLB. hah!) (okay okay, I need to come back to earth now)

Moving back to what Lao Shi said about friendships, She said she believes that Secondary School Friendships are the purest friendships you can make, and "think of jc as a mini society, you will find all the 'funny' characters there". Than she reminded go out and have fun. Cause even if my classmates don't have a life, I need one. "Try to keep sane, in this insane world".

And the best advice she has ever give me, was, and always will be, "Justina, please remember to sleep. You need to rest." haha. And I nod obediently.

I guess I'm typing whatever she says down for memories sake. When a day comes when my head is just saturated with useless info that I'm not gonna use on a daily basis, and when I feel that all is lost, atleast I have some wise words to read. Oh well, Lao Shi is just a call away anyway. When I wasn't sure which jc to go to, she was the first person I called for help. Chinese on top of the worry list, she took the effort to find out if I could do CLB in any jc. Not forgetting the CLB 'liao' she got for me for the O levels. I'm thankful to God for blessing me with a teacher like her. And I know she almost fainted when she heard I passed my CL with a C6. There's nothing much to say about God and the miracles He does.

Its ironic how the Best Teacher I ever had taught the worst subject I ever did.

-I Miss...Zhonghua-

Darkness

2008-03-05T19:38:00.003+08:00

It’s amazing who many words there are to describe sadness. And it helps that most of them start with a ‘D’.

Death
Depression
Disappointment
Downtrodden

And yes. It’s another emo entry.

Life’s just a big mess. I have never felt so lost, unsettled, insecure, unloved, physically, emotionally, mentally unstable. Oh wait. There’s more, suicide. And I also admit that I have lost some faith in God. I know God frown upon those who thinks/commits suicide. So I’m just a disappointment to Him. I’m just a big fat disappointment to everyone in my life.

Sometimes I wonder how a cheerful, loving person, that smiled her way through everything that came her way, turned into a person who thinks that life has nothing left to live for. Let alone she has lived her whole life following where God has led her to be today.

Let’s try to see the link between my messed up life, with my messed up emotions.

Trips on the train makes me think a lot. When I think too much, I feel too much.

I don’t have a proper classroom to settle in, hence I’m just moving from lecture hall to lecture hall to classrooms.

I can’t find any true friends who I think are worth letting in.

No word in the dictionary can describe School work.

My source of motivation has gone. (It’s sort of dumb, but it’s the one that’s causing ALL the heartache and tears) It’s just a lot of questions in my head. And my ONLY answer is to cry. Cry when I think of the past. Cry to the songs we sang to each other. Freaking hell, everything reminds me of him. He literally built me up and tore me down. So you can go ahead and tell me. “He’s just a jerk”. But I worry a lot for him, because I care for him. He’s not the best guy you’ll ever catch, and obviously he wasn’t an angel either. I may not understand his flaws, let alone, I don’t really approve any of them. But he’s got a heart I love. He was there to pick me up. And now without him, as much as I try, I can’t seem to motivate myself. I wake up every morning thinking it’s another painful day without him.

So after reading that point, you figured I failed on carrying out whatever I typed in my previous post. Is there a record on how many consecutive days a human can cry?

I think my life is like a 1000 piece jigsaw puzzle, and I’m a 2 year old trying to piece it together.

Maybe, just maybe, if you guys prayed hard enough, my next post would be happier. But it’ll take time. I’m stuck in a moment that I don’t want to end. It took me 2 years to get over a crush so imagine me getting over him.

I need to learn how to love me again.

-To All The Guys that Complicate My Life-

Inbox

2008-03-02T02:53:00.002+08:00

I was clearing my inbox, when I came across a message my dad sent me on my first day in jc. He said "Study hard. God loves you". It didn't really strike me the first time I recieved it, but reading it today did.

Even though a week has pass since I entered school, I think I have failed everyone. Though I chose this path, I truly felt that God had guided me this way. But im not very sure what lesson he is trying to teach me. Perhaps He is teaching me to be more independent. Or perhaps He is saying that the world is not as kind as I see it to be, and not everyone I meet is gonna be a true friend.

My first week of jc was pretty bad to say the least. And starting with the end in mind, is no where close in my mind.

I know I have been blessed in more than many ways than one. And all I ever want to do is to make my parents proud. Though I have never been smart. But I never ever want to be a burden to my parents.

They have blessed me with so much, and often I take them for granted. And I guess my only way of repaying them, is by being good and studying hard. But I fear if one day I should fail, I would have nothing to show my gratitude to them, and they would have 3 pathetic daughters and perhaps feel that they have failed in bringing up children who are respected by society.

So today, I mark a start of a Stronger Justina. And that means No More Crying. Chin up, and have No Fear. Cause even if it pushes me to the edge of my life, I just want to see parents happy.

Swollen Eyes

2008-02-29T19:43:00.002+08:00

I hate to emo some more, but I just have to. My first week in jc was hell. I understand the need to bridge the gap, but teaching at a speed faster than a bullet train aint gonna help, might as well not teach at all.

You could say I need time to adjust to my new surroundings, new syllabus, new subjects, new approach to teaching, new curriculum. As much as I have tried, I still feel rather alien. I hate sitting in lecture rooms, filled with God knows how many people. I just hate it. Classrooms were built for a reason people.

And what sucks the most, is that I have deduced that jc is not one place you want to make true friends. Its every man for himself. So can anyone please understand why im feeling so down? I so freaking miss all my friends. Just typing that makes my eyes well up with tears.

Im not very proud to say this, but I come home EVERY night, crying my eyes out. Everyone has put their faith in me, but I have failed them. I remember reading Val's message on the train, tears in my eyes. Even the simplest message of love can make me tear. All I have to say is that im thankful for all the loves in my life.

-You're Treasure-

Start With Nothing, End With Something

2008-02-21T14:15:00.015+08:00

Im leaving for Perth in a few hours. Kinda glad to get away from all the chaos going around. When I heard the subject combination talk yesterday, I think the stress started building up. Go ahead and think im weak. Mind you I have not used my brains to its fullest potential for like the pass....5 months?

Yesterday was alright. Made friends talked, ran round the school together, bought our uniform together, just to realise that it was a tad to big, so I dropped by school just now to change the blouse, than altered the freaking long skirt. Now all I need are my Nike shoes. Lets pray they have nice ones in Perth.

Hate to think about it, but when I get back, I'll be hitting the books straight. No turning back now.

And I hate to admit it, but when I came home after school, I was an emotional wreck. All I could do was binge and cry, I was so shocked to see how many student got retained in JC1. And I have already missed out on like 2 months of stuff, how in the world am I going to catch up. Plus, most of the friends I have made are going to an arts stream, so I have no one to depend on, no one to help me understand lectures, I have NO ONE.

Passed by Zhonghua on my way home, and as much as I hate the freaking people that run the school, I miss knowing the fact that when I go to school, my friends are gonna be there to make a boring day in school less painful. And it sounds kinda dumb, but I miss the classroom as well. I miss sitting at the bench outside the classroom, with papers and books all stacked up, studying my ass off. I miss the study corner all the 5N-ers sat at, studying all way to the night, till the security guard had to chase us out. I think I just miss the whole secondary school feeling.

Just to make myself feel better. Pictures!

Rememeber this.......I miss playing this. Don't you?haha. I have no idea how I accidentally uploaded this pic. Burger King, your Dairy Queen misses you.I really treasure the little notes you guys write to me. And often when I feel down, your sweet words are comfort in my heart.
Unlike others, im not the sort to adjust well to new surroundings. And its kinda shit when you actually need your new surroundings to help you survive through jc. All I hope for now, is just to be able to catch up with syllabus and make some depenable friends. Sounds easier than it actually is.

I need to stop emo-ing.

Sometimes, I think I use the word 'I', 'me', 'my' too much when I blog/text. Makes me sound so selfish.

Damn it! I just realised that since im gonna miss the first day of school, all the freakin students will take up the front seats in class! Shit! Short people like me need those seats!

Triumph starts with a TRY and ends with a Big

Try Justina, Try

S.J.J.E.L

2008-02-16T23:15:00.009+08:00

What does it mean, when you dream about hugging a person you once liked?

Often or not, I believe that our dreams are the emotions of our inner self. Perhaps not all our dreams reflect our deeper feelings. But those that you remember, are those that you hold specific importance to.

Well, I do admit that I still care for him. And yes, I still hold on to many sweet memories I had with him. It beats having no memories at all. But I have made it totally clear with myself that I have lost my feelings for him. When he left, he changed too much for me to understand. And don't get me wrong, cause I still love him as a friend.

In that dream, I did what I have always wanted to do, I said the stuff I have always wanted to say. Though the dream ain't gonna come true, the emotions I felt were real.

-S.J.J.E.L I really do miss you-

Valentine

2008-02-14T00:10:00.005+08:00

Its Valentines Day today. Honestly speaking, its actually kinda sad to be celebrating it by my lonesome, yet I feel like I should reserve myself until I find someone deserving enough. Its not that I dont like the guys in my life, hell yeah, I love them. I just feel that waiting for that special someone, and giving my all, would make a relationship special. Jun Xiang says my perception of love is very mature, and I think so too.

The one thing I cant understand, are those teenage love couples who are lost in their own lil world, and when they breakup, they just freakin sink themselves into depression. Seriously, there's more to life people.

Perhaps im still trying to get over the last guy that liked me. He was there for me even at my weakest moments. Giving me the strength to pull myself together and do my best. The one who listened to me rant about hating to study for humanities. Constant messages that releaved me from unnecessary stress. And when he looks into my eyes, he makes me feel like a lil kid, warm and tingly on the inside. Yet, when I saw him cry, I didn't know what to say to him. Sometimes, I feel I was the cause of his tears. Than one day, the messages stopped. I told myself to get over him, and I really did try. And to top it all off, I sort of found out he was sort of like a gambler. Like I said, im reserving myself for that special someone, and although I can accept certain flaws, stuff like that just makes me all insecure. So its really bout time I got over him.

*******, I have a raisin, so forget that date.

Funny why I have no idea why I just typed that whole paragraph for.

Im not the sort to go through many relationships just to settle at one. I want something that lasts. To me, love is not just about understanding and compassion. Its more of a special someone loving enough, to bring out the better part of me. Showing me a different side to the world. Helping me view stuff from a different angle.

So, today's Valentines Day. And im gonna celebrate love, my way.

-Hearts All Over the World-

The Dating Game

2008-02-12T11:57:00.000+08:00

Yesterday, I went for a lil date with my darlings. All fingers are pointed at Yuhang at this moment cause he was the bored one, and wanted to go out. But im not blaming him cause I sure did enjoy myself. Big Smile. So after all the last minute, and I really mean last minute deliberation, we decided to head down to Raffles City(my idea).

Okay, before I start on the day, I really need to thank Teo Yuhang and my now ex-hubby, Benedict for helping me burn those extra CNY calories cause I was literally walking up and down the whole of Douby Ghout mrt in search of them. And low and behold, they were sitting on the steps beside the train station. Talk about making yourself visable. Yuhang, you suck at giving clear and precise destinations. But its alright, I still love you. hah

So Xianglin came late, then we headed to City Hall. Funny that Kuan Siong took the train to Raffles Place. Okay okay, I admit, I have made that mistake before. Once. Walked around cause darling ben wanted to eat. Finally deciding to eat at Out of the Pan, located near the central fountain.

So, if you figured, Ben was starved.

Nothing completes a good-ol meal like dessert! Though its not in the picture, the waffles were accompanied with orange sorbet, that had chocolate shavings in them. So yum, and so fits in with the CNY celebrations.

Kuan Siong didn't order anything. He was busy clearing his wallet, while we were busy chomping down our food. Blame it on his huge cup of Coffee bean coffee.

Yuhang has been craving for waffles with ice-cream for like...2 months? Hence, I took it upon myself to find a place that served good waffles to appease his taste buds. And I sure hope he did enjoy his meal. Sigh, the things I do for him.

What else can I say. I just love this picture.

Xianglin and I shared this. Strawberry Crepes! It had strawberry and custard filling, which wasn't too sweet, and complemented each other pretty well. Topped with vanilla bean ice-cream and seasonal berries. Super yum!

After stuffing ourselves, we walked around the area. Xianglin desperately trying to get Wendy and Hasyimah to join us for a movie(Yuhang's idea). Well, we succeeded! Duh, when you put Justina on the line, I can persuade any soul. hah. I got Huiling to join in too. Just at that moment, Ben and Kuan Siong left, for like the dumbest reason, play Mahjong. Don't ask me to tap into the mind of my ex-hubby, its uncharted territory. Guess he was the one who lost out, cause he missed watching a movie with Wendy. Awww

Trained back to Plaza Sing. where we decided to catch......

My very first chinese movie. Guess who sat beside me?

Yuhang Yuhang. haha

The movie was alright, a tad too exaggerated for my taste. Who cares anyway, I didn't. We than headed to Pastamania for dinner. And after, Wendy and Hasyimah left. So it was just Yuhang, Huiling, Xianglin and I. Walked from Plaza Sing to Ochard, in an attempt to digest our food. Headed home after that. Xianglin took the other train, while Huiling, Yuhang and I trained back to Serangoon. Waited for Huiling's dad to pick her up. And as per usual Super Sweet Yuhang walked me home. He's so sweet.

Yup. So that was my day out with my darlings. It was exceptionally fun, though dates like that arn't gonna come by easy when school starts, im glad to keep the memories.

5 years of friendship and counting. I Love Xianglin

-We Wanna Make A Memory-

Unopen letters

2008-02-12T11:32:00.000+08:00

A fresh beginning. A new start. A place to pen my thoughts down. Something to mark a special day gone by.